Dear Max,

Upstairs at Uncle Franks house the world is quiet, besides the muffled party noise downstairs and the bark of an occasional dog in the distance. It’s your bedtime. You’re laying on my left between my arm and my ribs with your little paw on my chest. Your penguin pajamas are even keeping me warm – at least on one side – and your fluffy hair is nestled into my cheek. It’s pure magic. 

It’s simple. 

The simple moments are sometimes, many times the best. Our lives get so busy that we forget to enjoy these little moments. A meaningful hug, a smile, a warm handshake, a laugh – it’s all so simple.

The simplest things have the most meaning. Seek them out daily.

Love,

Dad

Dear Max,

Every day you’ll be faced with a number of decisions and situations. If I know you, you’ll have even more opportunity than your mother and me. But, you must ask yourself what is most important.

The opportunities will come faster and faster the better person you are. And, frankly it’s hard to turn people down. 

Figure out exactly the person you want to be and what your goals are. Right now, I want to be the best possible father I can be. That’s why I’m with you as much as I can be. And believe me, I have to turn a lot of people down. 

Your happiness is my goal and my number one priority.

Love,

Dad

Dear Max,

The time is now:

• To write a book
• To go fishing
• To buy yourself something special
• To ask her out
• To make the difficult choice
• To work hard
• To develop the next big idea
• To start your own company
• To rise above expectations
• To be a better person
• To help a friend
• To help yourself
• To love
• To go on vacation 
• To start a blog

The time is now to do everything you need to do to meet your goals in life. Don’t wait another second!

Love,

Dad

Dear Max,

Yesterday you started at your new day care center. Its healthier, friendlier and more consistent but it still takes some getting used to. You may only nine and a half months old but your reactions to starting something new are not unlike your elders.

You were upset. You resisted change. You probably felt betrayed by your parents. You didn’t know what to do. 

As you get older you will be presented with new situations to adapt to frequently. Take it in stride. Adapting to new situations won’t kill you, it’ll only make you stronger and smarter.

Think of yourself as water swirling around a rock in a stream. The water moves around the rock gracefully and continues on its path. The water doesn’t stop at every rock. 

Love,

Daddy

Dear Max,

People won’t actually pay attention to you until you make them feel unsettled with their own situation. You need to do so well in whatever your expertise is that they worry about what they do on a daily basis. 

One of my favorite comedians, Steve Martin once said:

Be so good they can’t ignore you.

Steve’s right. No matter who “they” are, make them take notice. If they don’t notice, you don’t exist. 

Exist.

Love,

Daddy

Dear Max,

My dad used to call me his “wandering boy.” Partly because our favorite song was Dion’s The Wanderer and partly because I was always out, as I was involved in so many activities. It’s something I miss without him here because he was the only one who called me that. 

I was always busy. Looking back now I probably was too busy too much of the time, but I learned a lot. And, no matter what, I always called my parents and Grandma Iva every day. 

You can call me what you will, but they were always so close to me that I would call even if it were just for a minute or two. In fact, most conversations with my dad were about a minute long. The time didn’t matter, the thought did. 

Call and see those you love constantly. Wander, but know where home is. 

Love, 

Dad

Dear Max,

I used to watch my dad a lot. I’d watch him get ready, comb his hair, brush his teeth, fix things and just about anything else he did. I watched him because I wanted to be just like him. I wanted to know everything he knew and do everything he did. 

I remember watching him get ready for a gig or date night with Mom. He would get out his blue bottle of cologne, Royal Copenhagen. I remember it like it was yesterday. In one spin the cap would comes off and he’d dab it with his fingers on the side of his face. He would only dab a little, just enough to be dangerous. 

Today, I noticed you watching my put my cologne on and it took me back to those days more than twenty years ago. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to watch your dad and do what he does. It worked out nicely for me.

Love,

Daddy

Dear Max,

Overthinking causes unhappiness, uncertainty and stress. Avoid it at all costs. 

You know inside of you which way to go. Make the decision and move forward. Life doesn’t wait for you. In the time you spend overthinking, opportunity can pass you by. 

It’s okay to move quick. It just means you know what you want.

Love,

Dad

Dear Max,

Don’t doubt yourself. You are the expert of you. Nobody knows you better. 

Love,

Your dear old dad

Dear Max,

I bought a gift from a craftsman not long ago that told me these words:

“I treat everyone like my neighbor. It may be an old way of thinking but I don’t know any other way.”

He’s right, it is an old way of thinking. But, that doesn’t mean its wrong. When he told me he treats everyone like his neighbor he meant he brings the same amount of respect and manners to each person he meets.

In this case, holding onto the past is a good thing. Do the right thing and treat ’em like a neighbor.

Love,

Daddy